the cat killed curiosity

So this man, random as he was. drew a chalk line in front of me and said that, past this line was too far, that I couldn't reach past there even if I wanted to. right when he turned away, i tripped someone and they spilled there water all over it.. it faded away... and i just looked at it and said.. what a pity, sighed, and walked over it.
now see that really didn't happen.. it was some weird metaphor i made up. i keep thinking that i will have this great legacy, like Leonardo Da Vinci.. and that people will look back at some of my weird metaphors and read it like bible....
don't judge me...
everyone at some degree thinks the same things about themselves. wait a second.. this is the part of the poem where i made two poems that are completely different but i had no idea how i could put them together so i have to switch to something about..
love?
yeah that's what the rest of this things about!
so lets say I'm at a party. and i was but in my memory everything has kind of morphed together, so eventually i WAS at a party.. anyways. so i tripped into someone and fell in love instantly. but then i got slapped, so to the boy who held my hand twice but ran away or to the boy who is halfway around the world because i was too weak to ask him one simple question....i don't know what to say, i never want to see them again because its taken me two and a half years to come to the conclusion that they don't feel the same... and if i see them again, ill probably cry worse than i did when i watched rue die or when the little match girl got to be with her grandmother. and i I've already done it twice and the third one has fell into a weird pain that involved a knife, even though there weren't any knives, its just the pain, i would think it, would be pretty similar but even then,  without a hint of metal for miles, the cold aluminum feet that i have, keep me from becoming the cat that was curious enough to die. but since I'm not the one with nine lives i searched for hero to be curious for me.. i know its twisted..... but everyone lives for twisted endings..
just as long as there is a sequel.

one casualty

the limits of desire fears no stranger, yet knows nothing of love at first sight. so it feels stupid, it doesn't let it go. it eats at his body, takes limbs and makes them become fossils. history in time. just another collectors piece to be sold to a museum in north Dakota.
feel satisfaction?
wait,
my bad
did I say
limbs?
or strangers?
i meant hearts
let me repeat it all over again for you
the limit of desire fears no heartbeat, yet knows nothing of love at first sight. so it feels stupid, it doesn't let it go. it eats at his body, it takes his heart and makes it become a fossil. some history in time. just another collectors piece to be sold to a museum in north Dakota.
it fallows me, it sits on my back like featherless wings. hopefully desired yet biting the metal bar to stop the pain.
so i shut down the valves of my attention. cut off the blood supply, freeze the summer breeze to a bitter winter....rain? yet again hopefully desired, yet biting the metal bar to stop the pain.
the science of life, it swirls around a cup of coffee
death it yells!
but fate is what happens to you when you do absolutely nothing!

Throwing Shade: American Flag Clothes

Thank God for the Music (part 1)

I should have done better, you should have done better. not afraid I'm terrified. now I can't sleep at night. I want to. I need to.
oh how I have music breathing down my spine, breaking the knots in my shoulder. unwinding the pain in my worn out feet. but whatever I choose, the music will help.

Watermarks Behind My Face

i was given a red rose when i was a child, it smelled liked candy and summer rain.

after given the rose a whisper told me the biggest secret of life, but i didn't listen. astounded by there great beauty i just stared into there eyes. so may it be if i am killed on site for going on the greatest journey of my life. may it be if god sends me to hell. may it be if i fall in love.

may it be if i lose everyone in my life. may it be if i die only with one friend. and make him known as the best friend i will ever have. forever

ODE TO BELLE NOTE (ode to the beautiful night)

so this, this hand that wasn't mine, reached down and grabbed my palms and entwined a beautiful sewing of interlocking emotion.
and it was magnificent!
the idea of human feelings and free expression was never underestimated.
but death was.
and that was the final verdict.

DEATH WAS UNDERESTIMATED!!!

Safety And Silence

One more time
i seek you
i leave cuts and bruses in the paths behind me and i only ask for
it to fix the pain from the broken promises that
i seemed to have reaped for...  throughout these past few years
and i ask myself not to pick at the scars on my heart, because then youll just come back
in my mind and then i cant help but to smash my secrets on the wall, just hoping that it will make my life more interesting, and so that i don't have to buy this dishonesty anymore
and im gonna give my sanity away to everyone and there dogs.
and then the flow of my mind will be peaceful.
and ill be
safe and silent